Multiple Choice Questions

I have been for long, a proponent of the Multiple Choice Question format. The main reason is that it saves me from having to write a lot and simply give the answer.

In our school days, all our Maths teachers insist that marks would be given for the steps used to arrive at an answer, even if the final value was wrong. Similarly, in college, the mantra was simply that the more number of pages that you consume in a semester exam, the greater are your chances of clearing that exam.

Going by my academic records, it is very evident that this format has not really suited me. Agreed that I do come across as someone who writes a lot, but then quite often it borders on rambling. Which may be okay with the average reader of my blog, but is obviously not what an examiner (or is it evaluator?) wants to see.

And there was the eternal confusion anyway. Do I write 10 sentences for a 2 mark question? If so, how many do I write for a 20 mark question? Should I use a direct proportion or should I use some exponential equation? Should I underline the key words? Should I draw more diagrams? How much margin should I leave? How much header and footer space? Is it okay to use a "Pillayar Suzhi"?

That’s why I used to love all these entrance exams for admission to Colleges and Universities. They were (and most probably still are) Multiple Choice Questions. And I simply had to shade the answer paper at the appropriate place.

But then, for most of these exams, there used to negative marks. That was a bummer. It was however a small price one had to pay for the bigger comfort that it gave me.
And if you were one with a gambling streak in your blood, you wouldn’t mind answering all questions irrespective of the outcome.

But that posed a challenge to you. How would you answer a question for which you didn’t know the answer? Again, the advantage of Multiple Choice Questions comes to the fore. Since you only have to select an answer and not justify how you arrived at that selection, you pick an answer at random.

The average Indian, while selecting the random option, uses the "Inky-Pinky-Ponky" strategy. If by any weird chance, you are not aware of Inky-Pinky-Ponky, it is a small limerick used by kids while selecting the catcher in the "Catching Game" or "Hide and Seek" (not to be confused with the biscuit; its a game also known by its pronunciations "ice-boys") or "Lock and Key" or any such game. The kids stand in a circle and one of them recites the poem and points to a kid for each word in the poem. This goes in sequence until the last one is left. The poem goes something like

Inky Pinky Ponky
Father had a donkey
Donkey died
Father cried
Inky Pinky Ponky

So, the person against whom the last Ponky was sounded, was either the catcher or was eliminated. In the latter case, the process would be repeated without that kid and the cycle would continue until the last kid standing would be designated as the catcher.

Extrapolating the same strategy, Inky-Pinky-Ponky is used to select the random answer in a Multiple Choice Question paper. You start the limerick with one option; point each word at the next option and cycle around till you reach/eliminate an answer.

On Tuesday, I had to take an examination at work (mandated as part of my career progression in the company) and the question paper consisted of MCQs. It was a technical paper and I had no clue about the questions. Using some residual memory and my knowledge of English, I was able to answer some 6-7 questions. It was a test with 50 questions and I was woefully short on numbers. So, I had to use the Inky-Pinky-Ponky route.

But I found that it was getting very predictable. Since there were always 4 options in each question, it turned out that I was landing up with the same option number. Faced with this humongous challenge, I came out with an outstanding solution. Why should I stick with only Inky-Pinky-Ponky? Why not put the popular nursery rhymes to this task?

I did. So I went ahead with the following rhymes to choose my answers:
1. Twinkle twinkle little star
2. Jack and Jill went up the hill
3. Humpty Dumpty
4. Piggy on the railway
5. Pussy cat pussy cat where have you been
6. Hickory dickory clock

Needless to say, I didn’t clear the exam.

Perhaps, I need to try other nursery rhymes. Or even movie songs.

The hype over the new seven wonders

First of all, I find the very concept of "Seven Wonders" quite idiotic. Just common sense will make you question the basis on which the very concept came about.

And then there was this media frenzy and hype about having our Taj Mahal become a Seven Wonder. What the ?

What do you gain by making that tomb a Seven Wonder? Do you think that people don't know about that monument? Any travel brochure for India, has a picture of that. All international Government representatives who visit the country are paraded there. All international sports persons are taken there for the standard photo op.

So, do you think that all this non-stop propaganda was required?

And if you even think a little bit more, you will realise that this whole exercise is the brainchild of some private trust/organisation. And its not an org' that is very well recognised. If I had the money power, I would have set up a thingy myself, got some publicity seeking celebrities (are there any other kind) to endorse my group, then hire a good marketing firm and voila, I can have another set of seven wonders poll going on.

What irked me most was the insane number of emails that were being forwarded by "Gen-I" (Gen X, Y and Z are passe. Gen-I is for the iPod generation.) was quite simply mind-blowing. It amazes me that people who pass all kinds of aptitude tests involving so much of logic and maths, are unable to comprehend the simple fact that this whole initiative is stupid.

And ultimately, the only probable entity that could have given a stamp of approval for the whole event was UNESCO. And they have very clearly distanced themselves from this.

So, all that happened was countries - read third-world countries and border-line developed ones - that had easier access to SMS and Internet, voted en masse to the ones nominated from their country (obviously) and voila, you now have a new seven wonders list that excludes some REAL WONDERS.

If you want more details on the kind of money made by the mobile operators, the marketing groups and the organisation that started this vote campaign, please see the attached picture of an article in the Tamizh weekly KALKI.


Simple translation:
Number of SMSes polled = 1.2 Crores
Cost charged by mobile companies = Rs.3.00 per SMS (its a value service to send SMS to some special numbers)
Total = 3.6 Crore Ruppees.
The share:
Mobile companies = 75 %
Government = 15 %
The organisation conducting the survey = 10 %.

These are figures only in India. Just add all the thickly populated third-world countries and imagine the kind of money people must have made.

I hope someone somewhere does indeed wake-up and announce publicly, what a big sham this whole event is.

More details can be had in this article from today's The Hindu.

Cricket World Cup 2007

Whatever grudge you may have about the recent Cricket World Cup, at the end of the day, the team I was rooting for, WON it.

Whatever accusations the nay-sayers may have against them, they simply go out there and do the job that's required - winning.

They have talent, flair and most importantly, the b***s to fight adversity. You wrote them off, just because they had a few bad games leading into the WC. You hated them because they are MILES AND MILES AHEAD of their nearest rivals. Just because a great entity was having a minor hiccup, you started writing eulogies. You worked up idiotic sentiments like, lets at least support an Asian team.

Why the bloody hell don't you admire them and their strategies. Look at the way the got into Kallis' head with statements in the press about his inability to force the pace. Such an experienced person like him actually fell into it, tried playing unlike his self and lost his wicket. The semi-final is a telling statement of strategy getting the South Africans out even before a ball was bowled.

Then there is this other idiotic argument that they were never tested. Pure BS. Every game at this level is a bloody test. If "giants" like India, Pak and even S.Africa can fall to the likes of Ireland and B'desh, it just means that you have to play good cricket on all days and against any opposition. Aussies have proven that over the last 3 world cups.

Just see the results, they have not lost a single match in the last 2 WC. What more proof do you need that they are the best? They have the capability to outshine their opponents in any tournament or series. And on the big stage, they are able to elevate their skills to another level.

Another interesting piece of stat: Leading wicket taker, Leading scorer and Leading wicket-keeper in the tournament are all Aussies. The youngest amongst them is like 36 and the oldest around 38. And the player of the tournament - the oldest guy in their team. That goes to show how talented and motivated those guys are. They are there to really play cricket and unlike certain players in this country, they know what playing for the team really means.

They also know when their time is up. Not like the players in this country, who play only for the most idiotic of individual records like "The top run scorer on a single Tuesday" or "Maximum wickets taken by a bowler who takes 10 steps before delivering a ball".

Rajathanthiram - Thank you Jeeves

In one of my rare brainy moments, I wriggled out of a full frontal assault from my parents for my plan to watch Dhoom 2 at 9 AM tomorrow.

Like I may have mentioned before, I got decent tickets only for the 9 AM show tomorrow. Though the tickets were booked in the starting of this week itself, I hadn't told my folks, coz I knew they'd go ballistic.

But I didn't know how else to convey this to them without getting beat. This evening, when I was discussing this with Superthumby, I told him that I would tell my parents that only he had bought the tickets and that I had nothing to do with it, since it was given as FYI to me.

The plan had its merits, but the major problem was this: Next time Superthumby and his wife come home, my mom will ask him about why he booked the tickets for such an early show. Which in turn would put him in trouble with the missus, coz he's told her that inspite of his attempts to steer me away from a 9 AM show, I was adamant to the core and booked the tickets.

After I reached home, I thought I would tell my folks that we were originally trying for a 9 PM show but it turned out to be a 9 AM show. We mistook the AM to be PM. This sounded too flimsy.

At the dinner table, we were talking about this and that and I was searching for the right moment to broach this topic and also the right presentation. And then a flash of brilliance came to me.

I have been re-reading a few Jeeves stories this week and found myself in situations that Wooster finds himself. But Jeeves very often provides uncanny solutions based on what he calls 'the psychology of the individual'.

So knowing my folks' dislike towards me going out too late in the nights, or watching night shows, I put forth a very safeguarded statement: "naan onnu solluvaen, but neenga enna thittuvael" - loosely translates to "I wanna say something that will drive you mad". Dad then asked what the context was and I said that its about something I am going to do tomorrow.

The added advantage of saying things like this was, you give a big build-up and they start wondering if I was planning to elope with some girl in jafferkhanpet. So when I said its about a movie, their relief was quite evident.

Dad then asked if it was a night show and I replied in the negative. Then my mom gave out usual comments on the lines that I was going to have dinner and watch a movie after that and come home by the time our milk-woman drops the aavin packets on Monday morning.

With this expectation being set in their mind, I didnt want to stretch things any further and immediately burst their bubble. I told them that the show was 9 AM. Another VERY HUGE relief sign flashed on the faces and they were like 'as long as it is in the AM its ok'.

I didnt elaborate things any further, coz they might find out what a ridiculous thing it is to watch a movie at 9 AM. So I brought forth another topic for discussion and diverted their attention to that.

So all I can say for now is that, I didnt get shouted at for planning a movie at 9 AM. But I cant say what the reaction will be, post-facto.

Big thanks to you Jeeves.