Shah.. Rukh... Koun ho tum?

I am sure you have by now read/heard/watched the "shocking news" that Shah Rukh Khan was detained by US Immigration authorities when he landed in New Jersey last week.

Everyone's so damned upset about it. Everyone is wondering how this could happen to SRK?

This event gets instant media coverage. Politicians are jumping to his defence. So are Bollywood glitterati.

I just wonder where the @#ck were these nitwits when a former President was put through security check in the capital of THEIR COUNTRY.

That news itself came out so many months later and even then, it didn't come through Dr.Kalam and nor did it come out through the Government. It was an issue raised in Parliament by the Opposition; and if they hadn't, then the whole country would have not been aware of the humiliation.

But one good-for-nothing-over-hamming "actor" gets detained in an US airport and everyone is now concerned? What the @#ck? Is this the first time such a detention has taken place? If the USA can literally strip search an ex-President of India (on Indian soil that too), can strip search an active Defence Minister of India, when they can detain thousands and thousands of people landing/leaving their country, then they have all the bloody right to detain Mr.Khan.

If you think this was racial profiling, are you supporting every Indian/East-Asian who gets profiled thus? If this was religious profiling, then where were you when Kalam and Mammooty went through such checks - are they any lesser Muslims than this Khan?

I can even understand the reaction from the numskulls and bimbos of Bollywood responding with profound statements like:
1. Juhi - feels that the detention was "as absurd as Brad Pitt coming to India, being strip-searched, investigated and interrogated"
2. Farah Khan - "he can be discriminated (on the basis of religion), who else is left."
3. Mahesh Bhatt - "is shocking that Shahrukh Khan, who is by every definition a global icon, should be subjected to something like that".
4. Priyanka Chopra - "Shocking, disturbing and downright disgraceful. Its such behaviour that fuels hatred and racism. SRK's a world figure for Gods sake. GET REAL!!,"

Oh my God! He is a global icon? A world figure? Goodness gracious. Billions of blue blistering barnacles. Outside of North India and wannabe North Indians everywhere else, who knows SRK?

Like I said, I can understand these boneheads making such statements. But read what our Central Minister for Information and Broadcasting has to say: "I am of the opinion that the way we are frisked, for example I too was frisked, we should also do the same to them".

What the hell is happening?

I have a very simple request to all these geniuses and the million others who have said "that's right" to any of the statements above - why don't you try Satyagraha? Boycott anything and everything that is American. Don't watch Hollywood movies. Don't copy Hollywood movies. Don't buy American products. Don't stand in line at the US Embassy asking for visa to visit your child. Don't let your child stand in line at the US Embassy asking for visa to study in some college there. Do this to your friends and relatives as well. Stand in front of the US Embassy daily and ask them to leave your country. Don't sign the nuclear treaty with US. Cut off all ties with them.

People, please. Do wake up to the ground reality that whatever is done is only for (y)our safety. And you know what - my name itself has its roots in Farsi. And there is a big declared terrorist whose name is just a variation of my name in terms of spelling and pronunciation. So if this makes any Immigration officer pull me out of the Immigration line and check me - I don't mind.

All that Shah Rukh Khan is achieving is getting mileage for his next movie. He's well known to create such publicity stunts and this one is no exception (I am not saying that detention didn't happen; I am only saying that the stunt started when he advertised this to the media).

Wake up you moronic sycophants!

Breaking News: Will DMK join the UPA Government?

Read the breaking news here:

News 01
News 02
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If you read these articles thoroughly, you will realise that these were news reports from May 2004. Clearly, history is repeating itself!

If you are lucky, these links might also give you some breaking news!

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News 20
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The 2009 Indian election results

Disappointment.
Dismay.
Disgust.
Demoralising.
Distressing.
Deplorable.
Disgraceful.
Disturbing.
Dreadful.
Despair.
Dejected.
Disquieted.


Feeling all of the above because the results are basically
D A N G E R O U S for India.

Bollywood gives the finger, after voting in Elections 2009

Yet another case of a picture speaking a thousand words. Or at least 2, if you know what I mean.

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And the worst part is this news article. If getting the indelible ink marked on your right index finger is a violation of the model code of conduct, then is it okay to put the mark on the middle finger of the left hand? If the polling officer who made the mistake with the Karnataka Chief Minister is reprimanded, I think the officer(s) who put the mark on these Bollywood stars, need(s) to be fired!

சென்னை சத்தமம், I mean சென்னை சங்கமம்

With this காணும் பொங்கல் day today, this year's edition of சென்னை சங்கமம் is coming to a close.

This annual event which is the brainchild of the present Chief Minister of Tamil Nadu, Dr. Kalaignar Karunanidhi, is purportedly meant to bring the village culture to the urban masses of Chennai.

I can think of only 2 reasons why he came up with this event:
1. To siphon off Government's money into his family coffers
2. He got irked with the Carnatic Music festival season in December at Chennai and wanted to divert some attention here

One of the many venues for this event is the Elliots Beach at Besant Nagar. Apparently a stage has been setup at the skating rink and the cultural events are taking place there.

Since we Tamil folks equate good sound quality to loud sound, somehow a lot of sound manages to reach even my house which is around 2 blocks from the beach. The noise starts around 6 in the evening and goes on till 9.

And as part of the grand finale today, there has been a massive fireworks display for the past 20 minutes. Needless to say, this was not a tastefully done display. It has just been one blast after another for the last 20 minutes and there was not even a simple pattern like - all the sparking ones first, all the white ones next, then bunching the blue ones or the green ones etc. And honestly, I haven't heard such loud fireworks. The decibel level was definitely more than what one experiences during Deepavali.

Anyways, since today is the last day I am happy that this year's edition of Chennai Sangamam has come to an end. I hope the control of the State Government comes to ADMK as early as possible, because the political vendetta between DMK and ADMK would not permit them to continue with this event.

P.S.: Since when did a fireworks display become part of Tamil village culture?

Loot and share

While constructing our house in Sholinganallur, we came in contact with one of the Linesmen of TNEB of that area. He is a slightly resourceful chap and has been taking care of many things for us in our absence. He was a big help during our Grihapravesham also. He also takes care of our electricity bills and reimburses it from us.

He had come home this evening to hand over the keys to that house (he was coordinating the cleaning activity that was going on today). We were generally chit-chatting and he shared some very interesting piece of news.

Basically, he is looking to get transferred to an office nearer his home. And apparently, he has to pay Rs.5000 as bribe money to the guy in TNEB who is handling these transfers. He then further added that the A.E who had joined the office recently, had come over there by paying an amount of - brace yourself - Rs.3 Lakhs!

I was quite shocked and asked him why would someone pay so much? Do they expect to get "returns" to that level? Is it because he is the TNEB office of an area which is identified with the IT growth of the city? Would that mean that he can get good commission from the companies?

The A.E apparently charges Rs.5000 for a domestic connection where the actual amount that goes to TNEB is only Rs.1500! The balance Rs.3500 is split up on these lines (all approximate figures):
1. The AE - 1000
2. The foreman - 1000
3. The linesmen - 500
4. The store clerk - 1000. Why a store clerk? He is the one who releases the "Meter box" from the store of the office.

This begets the question - does the internal bribing make these people seek bribes from outside to compensate their expenses or does the lure of the outside bribe make these people bribe even their internal counterparts to ensure that they are in the right place?

Matching color

This is a good initiative from the Government, but somehow I feel a green colored board should have been used to promote greenery. Not a pale-blue board.

The need for long weekends

Why shouldn't the offices - Government/Private/Corporations etc. - adopt the US style of long weekends?

I agree that most of the holidays we have are religious in nature and so we cant really change the date to match a weekend. All I am saying is that we could probably work around the holidays, so that we get few contiguous off days.

Take the "New Year's day" leave of 2008. Jan 1st was a Tuesday. So invariably, many people take the day off on Dec 31st. And with the lower attendance, not much of routine work can take place in offices. In offices, we are dependent on so many of our colleagues in our team or other teams or other departments, that such leave days impacts overall productivity.

The offices could have declared holiday on Dec 31st and let the employees take a good 4 day break. Similar is the case for this year's Pongal leave. Its again on a Tuesday. And since there is a religious significance, the number of people who need to be with their family increases. And if you work in a city far away from your hometown, you have no choice but to take the day off on Monday. Effectively, there is thin attendance in the office and nothing really progresses.

If I had a say in these things, I would have that one day that everyone wants to take off, as a holiday. And if service companies are worried about the loss of revenue since they cant bill a customer, what I suggest is that they can compensate that day by getting the employees to work on a subsequent weekend in the same month or the next month at worst.

Perhaps I am taking a very one sided stance and not looking at it from a Business owner's perspective. But as long as I am on this side of the border, this is what I want.

Just garbage

Note: This posting was in my draft for quite some time and I forgot to publish it. So its slightly outdated, but at least reflects what I was going on in my mind a couple of weeks back.

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If you and your parents ever had a conversation in Tamizh, during the time you were a teenager, the phrase "nee kuppai kotta kooda laayakku illai" must have entered the scene at least one out of three times.

That phrase, my friends is applicable to the Chennai Corporation, the Mayor of Chennai, the Local Administration Minister of TN and also the Chief Minister of TN.

Collectively this motley group of morons, have ensured that come pockets of Chennai become "Stink-aara Chennai" a moniker far removed from the Utopian dream of "Singaara Chennai".

What steps had been taken by the Coprporation to actually inspect the new agency's capability to take over from the first guy? Going by the evidence that is visible even to a blind life-form on Mars, the Corporation has not done any such inspection.

A simple check would have shown them that the new agency didn't have the basic understanding of replacing the Garbage bins that the previous agency had. They might give a million reasons about delays in procurement or the vehicle that was transporting the bins getting lost in the Bermuda Triangle. But the onus was surely on Chennai Corporation to ensure that things were in place.

And after seeing (and obviously smelling) all the garbage piled up in the city, our Government took the great step of having the Policemen come and clear up the garbage. If only the officials in-charge of taking this decision had some exposure to senior managers of an IT company, they would have very well gone ahead and said any/all of the following:
1. they optimised the availability of people
2. they ensured that things went smoothly
3. they proactively took steps to minimise further damage
4. they feel they can start looking at this as a new business model

But as usual, I digress. Having Policemen clear garbage? That's so ridiculous. The Corporation could have very well deployed thousands of daily wage laborers for this. They could have gone back to Onyx right away and worked out a deal for a few days. But asking Policemen to clear garbage was a typically idiotic move that this Government is capable of.

As it is, the motivation of the force is quite low. Most of them join the force not by choice, but due to lack of other options. Agreed a whole lot of them act as stooges of the political party that is in power, but there must some good percentage of cops who are genuinely interested and deeply proud and passionate about being a Policeman.

Isn't the Government reducing the sanctity of the job by asking them to pick up the mountains of piled up garbage? One might argue that the Armed Forces are quite often called in for help whenever there is a natural calamity. That's a whole different challenge and definitely requires extensive planning and lot of courageous souls to participate in rescue operations. Not the case, while allu-fying kuppai.

Things have definitely improved now and the new company has started its operations. But I still cannot forgive this Government and Chennai Corporation for making my neighborhood such a big cess-pool.

Last Friday night was my first time

Last Friday night, was the first time that I booked train tickets over the Internet.

That evening, an aunt of mine (my mother's manni) passed away in Trichy and so my folks had to go there. Since we got the news only after 9 PM, we couldnt go right away. And considering my parents' age, it was not possible to send them by bus either.

So I logged on to the net and tried my hand at booking tickets over the net. After much help from Raghu (which by the way was a help that was timely as usual and has increased my debt to him manifold), we were finally able to reserve two tickets for my parents' onward journey to Trichy.

Unfortunately, the server was too darn slow and the whole process took nearly an hour. Then, for the return journey, we were unable to make a reservation. Since it was quite late in the night by then (almost 11.30), it was finally decided that I would go to Rajaji Bhavan the next morning and book tickets.

Saturday morning started with Mr.Aditya reporting for duty on time. I too woke up, had my shower and was at Rajaji Bhavan at 8.30AM, assuming that the booking counter opened only then. But, there seemed to be more experienced people and I actually had to stand in line for quite some time.

I finally reached the counter - nearly an hour or so after waiting. This period incidentally witnessed me and everyone else in the queues, having to park ourselves in a seat, for say 3-4 minutes and then having to move two seats ahead.

There I encountered one of the rudest and probably the quintessential Government employee. I had chosen the credit card counter ok. So, when I presented the reservation form, she asked me if I wanted to pay by cash or card. I answered that plastic was my choice and she pushed the form back to me. And said, "You have to write your card number, expiry date, bank name and cardholder name on the form. Its there on the board sir, didn't you read? Fill it up and come back. Next.".

I was flummoxed. This bloody bleep was asking to me leave the counter just so that I could fill in a few alphanumeric characters on the form and that too when the form didn't even have any explicit provision for the same. I just had to write it in the white space available.

I even searched for the board which, she said carried these instructions. After much scanning I realised that the dark, dirty and piece of cardboard which I had mistaken for a shoddy patchwork of the counter, was actually a notice board. On closer inspection, I was able to unscramble the symbols - a la Robert Langdon - and told myself that the bleeping lady was indeed right.

But what really irked me was the fact that she asked me to return to the front of the row to fill up this data. I mean, couldn't that bleep have at least started scanning for availability of tickets? She could have had me fill it out before issuing me the ticket. But no. That bleeping bleep had to demonstrate her bleeping superiority over me.

Finally, after more irritating comments from that female, I finally got the tickets I wanted for my parents' return journey.

But the experience was an eye-opener for me. I have made a solemn promise to myself that I shall henceforth not set foot into that bleeping office. I will endure countless timeout messages and connectivity issues with Railways' online server, but I will buy my tickets only through the Internet.

I simply don't want to interact with any of these relatives of Satan and Lalu.

Indian Government bans AXN TV channel

Why? Because they showed some indecent program!!!

News in NDTV
News in Washington Times


Seriously, is the I&B minister at the Centre crazy? What kind of whack job is he?

If you ask me, there is absolutely nothing wrong with AXN broadcasting that program. They actually telecast it late in the night (according to another news report), at a time-slot when they are permitted to do so.

Then why is this guy acting like this? If the erstwhile NDA Government or any of its constituents had done such a thing, just imagine what kind of hue and cry would have been raised by the "intellectuals". How much objection would have come up against the "moral policing". You don't have to wait long. We are only 3-4 weeks away from Valentine's Day. Just watch the way people react to the Shiv Sena.

But now, hardly few people even know about this blackout. Why don't the usual Arundhati Roys and Amartya Sens talk about this? They wont. They are just unofficial mouthpieces of the Congress/Communists.

And the political opposition aside, my personal opinion is that the ministry is having double standards. Reasons:
""AXN is banned for showing 'World's Sexiest Advertisements'. This was not a program that promoted any amoral activity. It was just a collection of ads that were just sexy.""

1. The ministry has absolutely no objection to the gazillions of serials (soap operas) being made in all the Indian languages, telecast in each and every channel that is currently being beamed on Indian airspace and beyond. Each of these serials have characters with extra marital affairs. Which is accepted by other principal characters. So many women are portrayed as being the embodiments of cruelty. If you know Tamizh, this link will give you more details.
So its ok for these channels to continue right? Including DD?

2. I am also peeved by the number of ads for condoms that are now being showed even during prime time. These aren't the educatory ones that used to come out some 10-15 years ago, where the Government mainly talked about various forms of birth control. They only said that condoms were one option. They did talk about other methods too.
But these days, I see that condom ads from the private manufacturers simply advertise their product. Nothing wrong per se. But then there are ads on TV for flavored condoms - try watching those ads with an inquisitive kid of 11 or 12 (on a side note, you don't get kids of any other type at that age) and then tell me how embarrassed you were.
I have a similar opinion about the seemingly endless number of sanitary napkin ads that are on air with good practical demonstrations, so that the viewers also can 'absorb' necessary information.
So is it ok to put such ads during prime time on all channels? Including DD?

3. What about the numerous movies that came out in Hindi a couple of years ago. Invariably the wife has an extra-marital affair and plots to finish off the husband? Just because you give an "A" certificate for the movie, doesn't make it a socially acceptable movie. Or one that spreads great morals.
Why don't you have your censor board ban such movies.

4. Next the radio. I dunno how many of you hear the local FM stations. Many of them play English songs at some time or the other. Invariably, they feature quite a lot of Hip-Hop, especially the type I like. As you might already know, if there is no use of the F word with its prefixes and suffixes, then it doesn't even qualify as a Hip-Hop song. So all these stations play the song, without any censorship of all these foul swear words. I have heard quite a lot of F and MF on FM radio. In fact, on AIR's stations themselves.
So will they ban AIR itself?
5. I don't even have to start off on Fashion TV right?
6. Almost every other program from Hollywood, will have a sex scene. Or at least lotsa kissing and cuddling etc. This is both in Movies and TV serials. In fact, the episode of "Friends" - which is the barometer for teenyboppers - I saw today, had Ross discuss threesomes with Joey.
So will the ministry ban all channels that air original English content?
7. Does the minstry have any clue about what the Energiser bunny acutally represents? Will they ban all channles that display that ad?

I can go on and on with various other details. But the point is, I am totally opposed to such bans because it wreaks of double standard. Of the highest order.

Probably, the ministry wants us to return to the days where the hero and heroine in a movie come very close to each other in a song, and u see a violent shaking of flowers on screen.

Its official. Abhishek and Aishwarya are going to get married soon.

During lunch, I was telling my friends that I was worried about the Customs department filing some mysterious case on Aishwarya, saying that she got a package ( from Holland ) and that this package had some 25K Euros in cash.

When I said this, my friend made a comment that its all because of Amitabh. That's when the tube light upstairs flickered and lit up.

The thing is, that Italian import ruling this country by proxy and our dear gem of Allahabad have both said 'un paechu kaa' to each other. Bachchan senior has been targeted by all wings of the Government ranging from the IT department questioning him when he was in ICU, to the Food and Civil Supplies ministry questioning him for not personally procuring vegetables from the local mandi.

This service was extended to Jaya Bachchan as well and we all know where/why/how the Office of Profit controversy started.

So basically, Bachchan and family are under a major pazhi vaangum padalam. Definitely, all the agents of RAW are now given full time assignments of monitoring this family. I am guessing that at some point in time, they chanced to observe a growing romance between AB Jr and AR.

Since the Govt. has taken this extreme step of pulling Ash up (for no fault of hers), it can only mean that they are convinced about the wedding plans of these two stars.

So its no longer a rumour. AB and AR will be wedded soon.

I pray to God to give AR the strength to come through this trial and tribulation, unscathed.

Also my best wishes to the pair. (With the 'engirundhaalum vaazhga' song in the background).